What it’s Like to have High Functioning Anxiety and How to Deal with It
You are seen as productive and high-achieving. You perform well at work/school, manage your family and personal responsibilities, side projects and hobbies. Busyness is your badge of honour. Friends and co-workers praise you for always being ‘in control.” You never seem to mess up any of your tasks, your work is impeccable and you are always ready to help. You look happy, confident and sociable, nothing ever seems to faze you.
Yet when you have a moment to yourself, that undercurrent of anxiety comes rushing in. It is a familiar buzzing feeling of nervous energy, where you are so afraid of being seen as “not good enough.” You are always wondering about what others think of you, whether or not you have made an impression, or if you have disappointed them. You find yourself stewing on details in order to control outcomes as much as possible. You suddenly “ghost” from social events or people because the anxiety gets too overwhelming at times. Due to the incredibly high standards you have set for yourself, you may also struggle with procrastination.
In spite of it all, you keep pushing forward because once you slow down, you fear the possibility of succumbing to feelings of low self-worth. To keep up, you might even have developed a dependence on alcohol or drugs. It feels exhausting but you won’t allow yourself to stop, because you desperately want to be seen as successful.
If you identify with these signs, you may be suffering from High Functioning Anxiety. No one can actually see your struggles from the outside because you hide them so well. Yet on the inside, worry, fear and racing thoughts invade every ounce of your mind and body.
Because of the shame and stigma of confronting your fears, you suffer in silence. Sadly, only you know how much pain you are in. High functioning anxiety takes a toll physically, emotionally and mentally, and over time more severe and debilitating mental health conditions may develop.
If you are reading this, it is not too late to seek help. Here are some tips to get you started:
Be aware of the signs and symptoms
The first step to recovery is to recognise the signs and symptoms of anxiety. Although high functioning anxiety does not appear to impair your life on the outside, it is often felt and experienced internally.
Be willing to sit with your anxiety
As tough as it may be, challenge yourself to have moments of solitude where you could allow yourself to make room for your anxiety. Imagine having a holding space in your soul for these difficult sensations and emotions and watching them come and go with time. After all, these experiences are not permanent, nor do they define who you are as a person.
Practice compassionate self-talk
Look back at your accomplishments and think about some of your attributes that have brought you to where you are. Acknowledge your suffering and pain, and encourage yourself like how you would talk to a best friend or child.
Manage self-expectations
In order to have it all, we strive to control every little detail, refusing to seek help or delegate our tasks to others. If we learn to adjust our self-expectations and understand that it’s OK to be messy, flawed and imperfect, we are actually giving ourselves permission to be human.
Surround yourself with positive influence
To suffer alone and in silence can be tormenting because we are not born to be isolated. We all need support and help from each other. However, being vulnerable to others who may not understand your pain can hurt instead of help. Therefore it is important to find someone you can trust and feel safe with to share your struggles. Read our post on What Makes a Good Friend to learn more about what to look for in a friend.
At Resting Tree, we recognise how difficult it can be to work through these issues. We are here to offer you support as you embark on your healing journey. Find out more by contacting us at info@restingtree.ca or book your free consultation today